Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Hallway Salutations Get Awkward

As Dave Gilbertson walks around the Widgets Corp LLC, Inc. corporate office, he tries to be friendly to each employee he passes. But after seeing Michelle Wolf six times yesterday, Dave was running out of things to say. "I used up all the greetings I could think of," Dave told reporters. "I really didn't know what else to say to her."

After using the standard lines 'hello', 'what's up?', 'how ya doin' and even 'howdy', Dave resorted to another language with 'bonjour'. "It's a good thing I saw that Olsen twins movie Passport to Paris," he said before quickly adding, "Wait, that last part is off the record."

Dave had a feeling he would run into Michelle again so he used Yahoo! Answers to research creative ways to say hello. That is where he discovered the line 'you smell fantastic'. "Yeah, that was the first one I saw so that was the only one that stuck in my head," Dave admitted. "I guess I should have stuck to 'hi'."

Human Resources has since announced that Michelle will not be punished for giving Dave a black eye.

Written by John Garrett