Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Manager Refuses to Accept Resignation

Cara Johnson weighed her options and decided a fresh start at a new company would be best for her. And she wanted to give her manager the customary two-week notice. "I told him this morning and all he said was, 'I can't accept your resignation'," Johnson said. "What the heck am I supposed to do now?"

Johnson's manager, Kyle Daniels, then told her, "I'll tell you what you're supposed to do now. How about finish that Accounts Receivable Aging Analysis?" Daniels then turned to reporters and said, "Nothing happens around here unless I say so. If Cara leaves Widgets, it will only be because it was my idea, not hers."

This is an unprecedented decision as it is the first time a manager has refused to accept a resignation in the history of Widgets Corp LLC, Inc. The Human Resources Department is not sure of the protocol. "We are reaching out to our peers. Until then, Cara is going to have to continue to work here," said an HR spokesperson. "I'm sure she will come to realize she really doesn't really want to leave Widgets. The other company is offering a promotion and more pay. Is that stuff really that important?"


  1. I swear to God this actually happened to me. Are you spying on me, Garrett?

  2. That's crazy. I just made this up as one of the most awkward work situations. That figures it
    happened to you.